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When a colleague is grieving: Navigating bereavement in the workplace

Rarely is it ‘business as usual’ when a colleague loses a loved one. Yet we often feel unsure how to thoughtfully handle grief in the workplace.

Fiona Lam
Published Fri, Jun 10, 2022 · 02:00 PM
    • Some grieving employees may show fluctuations in their drive and focus at their work tasks, but these signs should not be appraised as a loss of ability or interest in their job, says Liew Shi Min, senior psychologist at Singapore General Hospital.
    • It is important to show empathy without pity, and acknowledge that grief does not just go away, says WorkWell Leaders founding chairperson Anthea Ong.
    • Some grieving employees may show fluctuations in their drive and focus at their work tasks, but these signs should not be appraised as a loss of ability or interest in their job, says Liew Shi Min, senior psychologist at Singapore General Hospital. BT ILLUSTRATION: LEE YU HUI
    • It is important to show empathy without pity, and acknowledge that grief does not just go away, says WorkWell Leaders founding chairperson Anthea Ong. BT ILLUSTRATION: LEE YU HUI

    A FEW years ago, my boyfriend died. His sudden, bewildering death left me in shock and denial. For months, I reeled from the gut-wrenching loss, essentially on autopilot mode, and today there is little I remember from that time.

    Of the few things that did stick in my mind, foremost were the kindness, compassion and generosity shown by friends, family, co-workers and strangers alike.

    In particular, my boss at the firm where I was working then simply told me, without hesitation, to take as much time off as I needed. There was no probing for details, no questions as to whether this “loved one” – as I put it – was an immediate family member, no request to see a death certificate, and no deadline imposed on my bereavement.

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