Balancing acts: Lessons from a corporate leader and mother of six
It is about prioritising, delegating and not feeling guilty about taking care of oneself when needed
TO DO
- Sort out travel arrangements for two weeks’ business trips to the US, Paris, Japan, China and India
- Complete budget review for the year
- Develop business strategy for global sales team
- Register #6 for ballet exam
- Purchase tickets to #3’s piano recital
- Attend graduation ceremony for #1
- Support #2’s student council campaign
- Arrange to meet with teachers of all six kids at upcoming parent-teacher meetings
- Purchase groceries for the week
- Take domestic helper for her medical examination
For more than two decades, my to-do list was a never-ending story of responsibilities. As a corporate working mum with six kids, two dogs and a thriving pre-school business that I co-founded with my better half over a decade ago, I often get asked how I manage it all and stay sane.
This is the inside story of how it all gets done:
1. Build a rock-solid support network
I co-founded My Little Gems Preschool in 2010 with my long-time boyfriend-turned-husband. It was a way to educate our growing brood of kids even as I climbed the corporate ladder at an American multinational as the Asia-Pacific head of strategic development.
That period was not easy. I had four kids under five years old and was travelling around the world for work. Meanwhile, our fledgling preschool business was in startup mode.
Luckily, I had the strong support of a loving extended family that chipped in whenever I needed help.
BT in your inbox
Start and end each day with the latest news stories and analyses delivered straight to your inbox.
My mother – who raised three girls as a single mum – and my two younger sisters made it possible for me to concentrate on work when I needed to, knowing my family was well taken care of.
For our preschool, meanwhile, we employed experienced preschool teachers and management who were able to deliver the high-quality education and strong values we envisioned for our kids.
2. Foster a growth mindset
My upbringing and education – at a girls school – meant I was surrounded by women leaders who excelled in work and life. In my mind, there was nothing I could not achieve if I put my heart into it and knew what I wanted.
So, when the opportunity came to pursue an executive master of business administration, I did not hesitate to accept.
This 18-month full-time programme came at a time when my career trajectory was accelerating: I was a regional head in a P&L (profit and loss) role within a global healthcare logistics company.
The role came with intensive global travel and stretched revenue and sales targets. Around that time, I found out I was pregnant with my fifth child. Within a year after that, I was expecting my sixth.
Continuous learning and growth is something I constantly seek, though. Having kids and starting a family was not going to stop me from enjoying the life I wanted for myself.
3. Embrace imperfection and let go
It was a challenge then – being a corporate working mum in a full-time role, enrolled in an intensive full-time business course, while tending to babies at home.
Ever the go-getter, I even breastfed my kids for as long as they wanted.
During that period, embracing imperfection was a game-changer for me. Learning how to let go of the little nuances and disruptions that came up made things easier to manage.
Recognising that the limited time I have with my kids outside of work cannot simply be spent chasing after schoolwork and grades, I have also opted out of the Asian tiger mum stereotype.
If there is a simile I would use in managing my life, it would be this: Sometimes, I just have to let the kite loose to make sure it continues flying.
4. Find quality time
Every quarter, I dedicate a week to spending time with each of my six children on a one-on-one day out.
This “yes day”, inspired by the movie of the same name, gives each child the opportunity to do whatever he or she wants with mum – even if it means having ice cream for three meals or watching movies non-stop.
It is a day everyone, including myself, looks forward to, because we have so much fun doing things we typically would not do when we go out as a family of eight.
Even as my older kids hit the teenage and young adult stage, mum’s day out continues to be a tradition. It also gives me insight into my teenagers’ lives, in what would typically be a very trying time.
5. Prioritise ruthlessly
Being in the healthcare logistics space, the Covid period was particularly trying. Even as many industries slowed down, the cold chain healthcare logistics sector was charging ahead.
During this period, I was promoted to serve on my employer’s executive committee team – overseeing global sales operations.
Parents would remember those days of home-based learning. With six school-going children, my home turned into a tuition centre while I managed supply chain crises with my regional and global teams.
I found that I had to prioritise ruthlessly and focus only on the things that mattered most.
6. Self-care is essential
As I approach mid-life and reflect on my journey, I have decided to take a step back from the corporate world to pursue other things that matter to me.
Some may call this a mid-life crisis, but I see it as a mid-life breakthrough. It took a lot of courage to let go of a seemingly successful global career, but I decided it was necessary to reset and take the time to find myself again.
Over the past year, since stepping out of my corporate role, I have pursued my interest in inspiring other senior women leaders.
I founded Phoenixus, a network of senior women leaders passionate about empowerment and leadership.
Our mission is to nurture the next generation of leaders to do business for good, and support underprivileged women and children in the community.
This community has since grown to over 400 women leaders who have come together to support one another’s journeys, and to achieve the life and success they each envision for themselves.
This life journey of balancing acts continues for me. I have learnt that balance is not about doing everything perfectly, but about doing the right things at the right time.
It is about prioritising, delegating and not feeling guilty about taking care of myself when needed. Most importantly, it is about living in the present moment and letting go of what I cannot control, and that is how I manage the balancing acts in my life.
The writer spent over two decades in the clinical research and healthcare logistics industry. She is also director and co-founder of My Little Gems Preschool, and founder of senior women leaders business network Phoenixus.
Copyright SPH Media. All rights reserved.
