A great escape: How to prepare to hear, and say, 'I quit'

GOODBYES are tough. Whether you're chafing at the bit to run, or leaving more wistfully for a next phase in life, it's rarely easy to break the news.

It's also hard for the teams you leave behind. Managers are worried about the hole you leave behind, and the fallout on team morale. They may ask themselves what they did wrong. Colleagues foresee their workloads swelling, and wonder if they are missing out by staying.

Work aside: if you've built solid, authentic relationships with the people you work with, then quitting can be emotional on all ends.

Things don't have to be this difficult. With planning and communication, we can make resignations easier on all of us - and even celebrate them.

Employers, think ahead

First, assume that they will leave. The question is not if, but when.

The ongoing surge in white-collar resignations, with mass exoduses in professions like lawyering, are making us sweat. But job-switching is part and parcel of working life, especially among the younger ones still feeling out their paths.

The two-year mark is a good time for managers to sit up and take a closer look. Has your employee grown in that time? Are they ready for larger responsibilities? Would they like exposure in a different part of the business?

Speak to your team members, and make it a deliberate conversation. Invite them to share where they want to go in their careers. This can help prevent you being caught off-guard, and could save you a valued employee if you offer them a more appealing growth path within your organisation.

Both regular check-ins, held casually over coffee, as well as yearly and more structured reviews are important.

Second: If and when your employee decides to quit, don't hold it against them. Celebrate their contributions, and wish them the best. A farewell lunch or drinks, and a parting gift from the team, are nice touches.

Stay connected with your employees after they leave. Drop them a friendly note now and then, or invite them to team get-togethers if they are recent alumni.

Some will be moving to other employers that could be helpful to your business objectives in future. Others are moving on for personal reasons. Either way, you want all of your team members to know that you value them as people - whether or not they work for you.

Third, make sure no one on your team is indispensable. If you can think of someone you can't afford to lose, then that member is not only a tremendous asset, but a business continuity risk. Take pains to ensure opportunities for knowledge transfer, like proper covering arrangements and shadowing.

This is not only for the sake of business resilience, but also for your employees' well-being. People should know that the sky will not fall without them there to hold it up. They can plan their breaks with greater peace of mind, and catch themselves from burning out. In the long run, everyone benefits.

Employees, leave gracefully

People leave for different reasons. Readers have written to me with dire tales of leaving toxic and dysfunctional workplaces. Legal battles and formal complaints lodged with the authorities may even be involved.

It bears saying: if your current employer is doing something you suspect is illegal or below-board, you should report it. It's the right thing to do by society, and for the colleagues you leave behind.

But if your reasons for quitting are less dramatic, then my advice is to try and mend your bridges before you go. Be honest about why you're leaving, but there's no need to be cold.

If you come across as a single-mindedly aggrieved rage-quitter, your feedback is less likely to be taken to heart. If you offer an olive branch and signal good faith, your honesty may move managers, and organisations, to reflect on their own practices and improve them. If nothing else, you may find emotional closure.

Of course, the happiest kind of resignation is the one where you have genuinely enjoyed your time at the organisation, and simply find it time to move on.

Reflect on what you've gained, and pay it backwards. Make sure you've filed everything your colleagues need to know, or may find useful in the future. Document your regular duties and major projects, and arrange a handover briefing.

If your successor has already been identified, then speak to them candidly and generously: about what you've learnt on the job, what you hope they can accomplish or sustain without you, and what you wish someone had told you on your own first day.

You likely joined an organisation or team because something about its mission or purpose resonated with you, at least a little. Your one last, precious gift to them is a proper handover. It also doesn't hurt to leave your employers on a warm note, that reinforces their memory of you as a responsible person.

Needless to say, keep in touch.

Parting can be sweet sorrow

Employers and employees aren't family, and sometimes they aren't even friends. But jobs are a big part of our lives. It's hard to spend much time in a role without developing feelings, one way or another, about our jobs and the ones we work with.

We can make our goodbyes easier by preparing ourselves, our teams, and our organisations to deal with departures in a resilient and caring fashion. Now that's a great escape.

READ MORE:

• The so-called 'Great Resignation' is no workers' revolution, but an opportunity
• Behind the exodus of junior lawyers
• In 'toxic' workplaces, the rot starts at the top