The hongbao conundrum

CHINESE New Year means a lot of things to different people.

For many, it represents time spent with family members. For others, the festive occasion is synonymous with food and goodies.

But, for married couples, it is – probably – a social landmine that needs to be dealt with sensitively. The checklist before the festivities begin would likely range from “who do we visit first” to “did we leave anyone out in the roll call”.

And of course, there’s the imperative of – as my husband would phrase it – “how much money to give for hongbao, ah?”

Sadly, Google is of no help here. The amounts range from as low as S$20 to as high as S$188. And I can’t possibly give different amounts to different people just because “I like the other person more” – or can I? 

After much thought, I decided to take the old-fashioned route of asking the people around me. 

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But the “help” rendered by them was questionable.

The answers I received invariably devolved into complaints about how “giving red packets in (the spouse’s) family is akin to a competition of who gives more”, and suggestions on how it all “depends on how close you are to the person”.

Amid a rising tide of vague answers, I grew more and more confused (and vexed). It was becoming increasingly difficult to shake the question of how much to give.

As I traversed the proverbial rabbit hole with Google, an article came up that reminded me of the significance behind that red packet. Hongbao, regardless of how much money they hold, are tokens of wishes for good luck, happiness and blessings. 

Moreover, as I asked the people around me for “advice”, I gathered that the range of family practices is so diverse that there really can’t be a one-size-fits-all approach. 

Ultimately, I’ve decided to give almost everyone, from cousins to nieces and nephews, the same amount of money in each red packet. 

I suppose this system of equality for all will solve the conundrum of how much to give. And, of course, it is easy to remember too – I just have to remind myself to factor in inflation and the rising goods and services tax every year to peg it to “market rate”.

Anyway, I will know whether this method works or not in a few days’ time. After all, it’s the thought that counts, right?

The writer would like to wish all readers a happy Chinese New Year. As we Singaporeans like to say: “Huat ah!”